Me, forty-one, walking with Theo, four, and we are in the totally age-appropriate rut of why, and but whyyy, and I am not at all annoyed, just enjoying the moment because he is, barring a medical miracle, my last progeny, and he will never be four again and one really can’t bank on grandkids because I could choke on a bagel tomorrow and, anyways, their—the grandkids—conception isn’t really up to me now is it? So, the sidewalk is empty and we are in no hurry at all, and in the grass we see a crowd of scaly-breasted munias, so tiny and cute, also known as ricebirds or nutmeg mannikins (from the Dutch for “little man”!) or spice finches (which sounds like drug slang), and as we pass they chitter and hop further away and some go airborne in less time than it takes to think or blink, darting through the air like fish. And then it starts again with Why are there birds? Because they evolved. (Very hard to explain to a four-year-old.) But, why are there birds? Because someone brought them here. Because this is their home. Because God made them and they are beautiful. This progresses to But why do we need birds? repeated, with the emphasis on need getting louder and louder each time as in Why do we Need birds? Why do we NEED them? while I walk along in silence, speechless, having already hit the Why Wall, the Cul-de-sac of Spiritual Logic—we need the birds because they are beautiful; the birds are beautiful because we need them—thinking half-heartedly about ecosystems and birds’ vital roles in seed dispersal and insect control, etc., etc. but also astonished because in the space of a short ten seconds I go from never having thought about birds as something I needed, personally, to wondering if birds could even be a need, to knowing deep down that yes, yes dammit, I do need birds, I need them and not just because of all the complex ecological reasons but also because when I see a company of munias flutter away I flutter too, and when I am walking to my office and I see a golden plover eyeing me while it never stops foraging in the dirt under the coconut palms—charging up for its 3,000-mile nonstop flight back to Alaska—I just start talking to it, something I don’t normally do with random birds, because plovers are bird celebrities and I am awestruck and don’t care who sees me conversing with this fowl, and when I walk away it feels like I’ve just, like, witnessed something. In other words: I was present. In other words, my sweet son, if you are grown now and reading this, we need the birds like we needed each other that day: to feel alive. And the inverse: without them we are less alive. Like how football is never really Football unless you’re watching it with Uncle Jeff. Or how the holidays aren’t quite the Holidays after your parents are gone. Birds are family (give or take 600 million years of evolutionary time). And if that’s too sentimental, how about this: birds are cash. That extra fifty bucks you save on gas one month because the weather is good enough to bike to work. And then you end up needing that money to make rent. Birds are like that, an unexpected windfall. The little bit of extra we didn’t even know we needed until we did. Could birds be the difference for us, the razor-thin margin, between homed and homeless? Between flush and strapped? Between, possibly, life and death? Who knows? Do you want to take that chance? I don’t. We need them and maybe, mayyybe, hopefully, they need us. I’ll try asking the plover. In the meantime, Theo, if you are still wondering how the conversation ended, I admit that I finally just told you the same thing I always said when pressed to the absolute limit of Why? I said, Just because. And, really, no reason is still a mighty fine reason when it comes to birds—with words being ultimately no match for what just is, right? But alas, my boy, you were young and disappointed with my chronic lack of satisfying explanations (as if anything would have satisfied you, really) and you cheerily moved on to asking Why are there streets? and Why is you like donuts so much?
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Joe Plicka’s work has more recently appeared online in Booth, Hobart, Ekstasis Magazine, and Monkey Bicycle. He lives and teaches in Hawaii with his family, a shaggy dog, and a red-vented bulbul.
11 comments
sonya says:
May 21, 2021
Love it.
David says:
May 25, 2021
But Why? I also need birds, just to enjoy the freedom they demonstrate. I love to watch the curiosity of birds, and can even learn from them. Birds often tell me when the bananas are ripe, or when to pick the mangoes.
I love this story
Alisa says:
May 26, 2021
I so totally love this.
Fwiw, to a 4yo, why almost always means “how is it relevant to me.” The best answer to “Why is that tree there” = “So we can have a picnic under it,” or “So you can climb it.”
Emily Bradshaw says:
May 27, 2021
I love this fleeting moment and all the ways you deal with age and youth and transience and complexity and simplicity and the insufficient power of words to cover it all.
Robin. says:
May 27, 2021
I need birds. I worry when I don’t hear them chirping. I need inquisitive 4 year olds too. Love this short story.
Kristen French says:
May 28, 2021
I wake up to the sound of birds chirping every morning. I need them, they help me start the day knowing that there is more to this universe than me and my stresses and worries and responsibilities of life. Thank you for such a beautiful essay!
Theresa van Baalen says:
Jun 7, 2021
Love this!
Chris says:
Aug 28, 2021
Love it.
Veronica says:
Sep 13, 2021
Beautiful essay with great insight that really helped me realize there are small things in our everyday life we take for granted that we might realize we actually need–funny how sometimes kids are the ones who make us pause and really look at the world.
Gifty Anab says:
May 3, 2022
Beautiful essay. The whys of everyday makes us truly understand the beauty of the world.
Mark says:
Jul 4, 2024
I live in Cuernavaca, Mexico, and have just read this great piece. This area is native to the wild turkey and to one of its family known as the chachalaca. Try rapid-repeating that name in a loud, defiant and snarling voice and you’ll have some idea of what this tree-dweller sounds like. The first time I heard it, I thought someone nearby was dragging a sack of scrap metal across broken cement. The raw call of a crow is melodic bliss compared to the chachalaca’s rasp. Yet, I’ve come to love it and, yes, need it. Thank you for getting me to that last point. Now that I’ve heard the chachalacas, I’m going to start talking to them. They don’t sound like easy company, but I’m going to try.